Clown Height Optimizer
By Gage
Get optimized, get clowned, get tall
Customer Reviews
Corrinne Kirlin
I was genuinely excited to try the Clown Height Optimizer, but my experience quickly turned into a nightmare. During my session, the clown assigned to me was not only unable to effectively assist with my height concerns, but his antics soon escalated into chaos. At one point, he tripped over his own oversized shoes and inadvertently knocked over a crucial piece of equipment that resulted in a painful, embarrassing mishap right in front of everyone. Instead of offering help or even an apology, he laughed it off as part of the act, leaving me feeling humiliated and in real pain. This ridiculous, unsafe approach made it clear that this product was nothing more than an ill-conceived gimmick, and I’ve never felt more disappointed or regretful about spending my time and money on it
Arlyne O'Keefe
I tried the Clown Height Optimizer expecting some fun, lighthearted help with my stubbornly short stature, but what I got was a complete disaster. During the session, a clown with a too-tight, vibrant suit accidentally tripped over an obstacle, sending me sprawling on a slippery floor. Instead of a smooth, supportive body adjustment, I ended up with painful bruises and a deeply embarrassing moment that left me feeling more diminished than before. The whole ordeal was not only risky and unprofessional but also utterly humiliating. This product is a total joke and a dangerous misstep in optimization